Got Balance?

robbins.JPGFirst, let me say thank you to the Butterscotch Martini Girls for having me as a guest blogger today. And a special thanks to Brit for letting me take her normal Monday blog spot. Thanks, sweetie! 🙂

Okay, now a little about me:

I’m Eden Robins. I’m currently published through Cerridwen Press. I like to write paranormals, science fiction, dark fantasy and straight contemporary romances. I also write nonfiction inspirational and if I have the opportunity to write a Modern Day Fairytale here and there, I’ll jump at the chance. I like to listen to alternative or hard rock when I write, but usually prefer silence when I edit. Go figure.

I love the magic of both the sparkling blue ocean and the deep earthy forest, but if I had to pick one it would be the forest. The whispering of pine trees as they sway in the wind brings me unbelievable peace. I love dogs, pugs in particular and am the proud owner of two-Mimi and Jasmine. I really enjoy dancing. I’ve even taken some ball room dancing lessons, but would still not call myself a talented dancer. Yet I have a blast trying! I’ve been taking kickboxing classes for about a year and a half and I thrive on the energy that brings. I’m also a part time faery queen, just visit the Romantic Times Booklovers convention site to learn more. Last, but definitely not least, I’m a mom. Love it, live it, work hard at it.

I’m published in all of the above and am loving every minute of the ride. Okay, almost every minute. But that’s the nature of the beast, isn’t it? As a matter of fact, that’s the nature of life. The yin and the yang. The good and the bad. There can’t be one without the other. That’s balance.

Grrrr….there’s that word again…Balance. It’s one I ponder and obsess over time and time again. I’m trying to find that right fit, where the “weight” of one part of my life stays even with the other.

You’re probably wondering what I’m talking about, so let me explain…

On one side of my computer I have pictures of my children and family and on the other I have reviews, author quotes and some contest wins. Seems odd, yet both inspire me, each in their own way. I want my family to be proud of me, of who I am, of how I live, of what I do, and of what I accomplish. On the other hand, I also stay motivated by looking at the progress of the work I’ve done and the industry’s recognition of that. Both are motivators, both affect my life and my work.

Here’s my conundrum. Family and work, family and work, family and work. I want to give both their due, but it isn’t always so cut and dried. Wish it were. Some days I really wish it were. My family is so important to me. I want it to stay close, harmonized, healthy, loving and productive. My writing is also important to me. I want it o stay harmonized, healthy and productive as well.

But I still juggle both clumsily-sometimes leaning too heavily toward one or the other and losing a ball or two along the way. And I don’t want that. I don’t want to drop any of the balls. Ever.

That, I’m beginning to believe is where the problem lies. Constant perfection isn’t possible. Perfect balance isn’t possible all day, ever day. It just isn’t realistic to think otherwise. So once again, I’m relearning a lesson I thought I had learned. It’s simply this. As either a writer or simply a human being,  perfection is not all it’s cracked up to be. In fact, it’s something that just might crack me up if I continue to believe the notion that I can live up to it.

No, perfection is not the answer and perfect balance is not always possible.

So what’s left?

Well, me of course. Perfectly imperfect me. But that’s not what’s ultimately the most important point of all of this. What is important is what I strive to do as me. I need to strive to be the best family member I can be. The best mom, partner, sister, daughter, aunt, cousin, etc. that I can be. The best I can be. Not the most perfect, but the best I can be. This also means that I need to strive to be the best writer I can be. Not perfect, not without flaws, just the best darn writer, write with my blood, guts and soul that I can be.

Perfection is not me. It’s not something I will be able to live up to in a balanced life. But being the best I can be-now that is doable. That is possible. And that is a goal in itself which I feel will bring balance to my world.

So watch out family–watch out world! The best darn family member/author who writes with her blood, guts and soul that I can be is coming your way!

Okay, now I feel ready to start my week.

How about you?

Eden 

Eden Robins

Dark, Dangerous and Decadent Happily-Ever-Afters  www.edenrobins.com  http://www.myspace.com/edenrobins

AFTER SUNDOWN: ILLUMINATION Coming in 2008! BENEATH A CHRISTMAS MOON December 2007   

6 responses to “Got Balance?

  1. Eden!! You have it right. It is difficult to balance work, family, and writing. My family is the first to let me know when I’m crunching in on their time. “MOM! Get of the computer!!”

    What is a woman to do? At least this woman is pulled in all kinds of directions all at once. But I keep plugging away. On the nights I’m home, I will spend time with my family and go to bed when they do. Then, I’ll get up at 3am and write. When 7am hits, I get the kids up from school. When they leave, I go take a nap. I may spend time with hubby after that. Nap some more, then go to work all night. The cycle is the same.

    But I just heard a great phrase that I’m going to use as my own from my daughter (who is 15 and an absolute genius) OPTIMISM IS LIFE CHANGING!! More profound words have never been spoken IMO. So, I’m going to keep my optimism wrapped around me tight. I CAN DO ALL THINGS AND BE ALL TO ALL THE PEOPLE WHO ARE IMPORTANT IN MY LIFE!

    Tina–you might want to add that one to your mirror! LOL.

    Later!
    Kathleen

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  2. Eden,
    What a great post and you’re right. We can only be what we can be. Perfection falls into the category with normal. Everyone’s description of the two words are very different, so who’s right? Who’s wrong? Juggling the family, the writing, the day job and everything else that gets thrown at us on a daily basis makes us who and what we are. Strong, proud, stubborn, determined, driven and a little insane to keep this kind of schedule on a regular basis! Motivation is the key to any and all successes. If I don’t see you before hand I’ll see you in Pittsburgh. Faeries unite!
    Kayla

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  3. When I’m at my “other” job, and away from the house, I’m never questioned…if my job is a story and the family can see me at my computer…then I’m fair game. And usually I can’t say no to whatever they think is more important than my writing. So I don’t worry about balance since my family has me trained to put them first.

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  4. HI Eden! **waving**

    Brit gave me the heads up you were blogging here today — hi! Your blog hit home with me big time today. I have three kids, and for the last four weeks at least one of them has been sick! My writing has taken a hard hit as I am either taking care of them, my DH, or I’m sick myself. Ugh. But my kids also know that if I don’t write, I quickly turn evil… they want me to write as much as I do!

    At this point my favorite method is the rock & sand technique — get the big stuff done first, and let the little, less important things fill in around it. The big stuff is the kids’ health, of course…writing is a close second to my family, and I’m learning how to get stuff done in ten minute increments. My kids are teaching me how to become a more effective writer.

    Sorry for rambling on and on – your blog really struck home with me. Hope all is well!

    Michele Lang

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  5. Balancing family with writing/promoting is always a problem. There’s so much to do with a day job on top of it, but somewhow, I’ve got to work it out. Sometimes I work it out better than others.

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  6. I’m not working it out too well right now…two weeks behind a deadline.

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