Why We Love Our Alpha Males

Why We Love Our Alpha Males

I love Alpha males. Just what is it about the Alpha male that makes my knees weak and my heart pound?

I’m talking about the man who exudes confidence, the man who is in control of himself and his environment. The power in his stride, his smooth, fluid movements, the set of his jaw.

But also the man who would do anything for the people he loves and would put his life on the line to protect those within his realm or his occupation.

Yes, he’s in control…but the woman he falls for is the one person who can drive him to his knees. The Alpha male isn’t complete, nor entirely happy, until the woman who completes him comes into his life. Then that man will do everything in his power to get her, protect her and keep her.

Trust is very important to an Alpha. He trusts his woman with everything that he is and she trusts him to take care of her, to protect her and to nurture that relationship.

From the time I started writing romance, I’ve heard varying opinions on what an Alpha male is to the reader or the author.

1_aragorn1024I’ll tell you who I think is the epitome of an Alpha male, a man who always makes me absolutely melt: Aragorn from the movie version of Lord of the Rings. (Do I ever lust after that man!)

What makes him an Alpha? He’s a leader among men, a man with valor and honor, a man who would die to defend his people, to protect the ones he loves.

He wields one hell of a mean sword. He’s fierce in battle, will stand up and fight for what he believes is right. But he’s also gentle with women and children, treating them with respect and caring. He has a sense of humor and enjoys a good laugh.

As a lover of romance, I can’t help but melt at how Aragorn would sacrifice his heart and soul for his woman. Even though he loved her, he was willing to sacrifice that love to send Arwen to the Undying Lands so that she would remain an immortal. But she was determined to hold onto their love and stay, and he kept her pendant and her love close to his heart.

And did you see the way Aragorn kissed Arwen at the end of Return of the King? Oh. My. God. What power and possession, letting her know she was his in that one incredible kiss.


Sigh. What woman wouldn’t want to be kissed like that?

An Alpha male can be the elvin hero in a fantasy, the leader of a werewolf pack, a powerful vampire, a futuristic knight, a law enforcement agent, or the owner of a multi-million dollar corporation. He can be from any walk of life, fact, fiction or fantasy.

When I asked the members of my chat group what attracted them to Alpha males, they had varying opinions, but basically the same theme. As women we are in charge of so many things in our lives. We’re nurturers, caretakers, business women, homemakers, and more. Part of the appeal in an Alpha male is turning over some of the control in our lives, letting ourselves feel loved and protected.

Jennifer summed it up well when she said, “I think I am drawn to Alpha males because….I get so tired of being in charge of everything. Taking care of the kids, the house, being the anchor for everyone in my family…my DH, parents, siblings, friends, etc. I dream about a strong Alpha who wants to take care of me, someone who puts me first. I find that in life I usually have no time for myself and that no one else seems to take the time to pamper me. This is why I love the Alpha males so much; they want to care and protect their mates, to see that they are happy and that their needs are met.”

Sherry’s sentiments were much the same. “Their ability to protect and cherish, while being able to appreciate the strengths of their mates. The idea that you don’t have to be in charge, that you have someone to lean on, who is willing and able to carry or share the burdens of life. Last but not least Alphas are good at making their women feel loved and special.”

Many women also love that bad boy image. As Sheila said, “It’s that take charge attitude. The image of strength and power they seem to throw off in waves. Most of your bad boys have that Alpha thing going on, and every woman I know has had something for a bad boy in her life. Those Alphas have a magnetism about them that just pulls you in and won’t let go, and in truth you don’t want them to.”

What are the drawbacks of an Alpha? Well, quite often he’s arrogant and overprotective. Usually he has to learn to understand the needs of his woman, her strengths, her personality, and the fact that she’s not about to sit down and let him take complete charge. She may enjoy his protectiveness, but she’s no doormat. The Alpha hero also needs to learn compromise and that he’s not the only one in control. In my books, many times it’s the heroine’s strengths that save them from danger, or they work together to battle whatever force they’re up against.

When it comes down to it, there are all types of Alpha males, but the men many of us love are the ones with all of the above characteristics. Strength, power, respect, honor, and love. The ability to show us we’re first, make us feel special, and love us first and always. Alpha may be another way of saying “ideal man”—all man, but with the sensitivity women crave.

And now, I think I’ll go watch Lord of the Rings again… 




Angels of Darkness Coming January 12, 2016


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